Yesterday was the first day that someone has tried to set me up on a date with one of their relatives. Unbidden, a man I have known since first arriving in Albania offered for me to meet one of his eligible, unwed cousins. I was flattered, of course, and curious as to who this woman was and is. After thinking on it however, I declined his offer for us to meet. There seems too much to risk and little to be gained in following that particular rabbit down that particular hole.
This morning on the jobsite I sat down with two men who have been brought in by Fisnik to perform a special treatment to the concrete. Our conversation turned personal quickly, as the people here always seem to be curious about why I am here and what my life situation is. The older of the two men, a man named Agim, asked if I would like to meet a young lady who is in his family.
Again I was flattered, and at a loss as to how I might respond, how I should respond. I am here to serve God, but I am a young man who is single and might enjoy taking a woman out on a date. Having said that, I believe that a date would be an exercise in disorientation for me. To my knowledge dating is not done in Albania like it is in the States. In English, and especially in a Christian context, we have a term called “intentional dating.” Albanian has no need for a term like this as it seems that intentionality is implied here. Built into the mores and folkways of the Illyrians are rules for the interactions about how men and women interact which I am only on the periphery of grasping. I felt fortunate to leave my conversation with Agim without a visit scheduled to meet the parents of this poor girl, whoever she is.
While out for coffee during the lunch hour, Vissy and I were dropped in on by Alban Datsi. Alban is the man who taught me how to say the months of the year. Vissy and I joked with him about being part of the secret police because he always seems to know how to find us when he wants to. Alban might drop his duff in a chair across the table from half-a-dozen friends or acquaintances in a given day; ordering a short macchiato every time. He never seems to have money, nor does he ever offer to pay. His taking part in our conversations is as assumed as is my or Vissy’s privilege to pick up the tab for him.
albaniacalling 